Salvare has thusly decided...

...not to see anymore R-rated movies. And if he does, and he tells you he has, you can punch him in the face.

-SALVARE

Liar!

THIEF!

BANDIT
BRIGAND
HIGHWAYMAN
BURGLAR
ROBBER
CHEAT
CROOK
CRIMINAL
KLEPTOMANIAC
PLUNDERER
PURLOINER
SWINDLER
SCOUNDREL

YOU STOLE MY POST (that wasn't very nice).

Are not lies but a corruption of the truth?

AND THUS A FORM OF TRUTH?

-SALVARE

Piven? Jeremy!

This should be enough to make any film fan clap for joy.

Man vs. Nature? Jeremy Piven? VERY YES?

-SALVARE

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers....

Enter the KING

WESTMORELAND. O that we now had here
But one ten thousand of those men in England
That do no work to-day!

KING. What's he that wishes so?
My cousin Westmoreland? No, my fair cousin;
If we are mark'd to die, we are enow
To do our country loss; and if to live,
The fewer men, the greater share of honour.
God's will! I pray thee, wish not one man more.
By Jove, I am not covetous for gold,
Nor care I who doth feed upon my cost;
It yearns me not if men my garments wear;
Such outward things dwell not in my desires.
But if it be a sin to covet honour,
I am the most offending soul alive.
No, faith, my coz, wish not a man from England.
God's peace! I would not lose so great an honour
As one man more methinks would share from me
For the best hope I have. O, do not wish one more!
Rather proclaim it, Westmoreland, through my host,
That he which hath no stomach to this fight,
Let him depart; his passport shall be made,
And crowns for convoy put into his purse;
We would not die in that man's company
That fears his fellowship to die with us.
This day is call'd the feast of Crispian.
He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,
Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam'd,
And rouse him at the name of Crispian.
He that shall live this day, and see old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,
And say 'To-morrow is Saint Crispian.'
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say 'These wounds I had on Crispian's day.'
Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember, with advantages,
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words-
Harry the King, Bedford and Exeter,
Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester-
Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered-
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in England now-a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.

Guess what day this is?

Thas right.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=OAvmLDkAgAM

and

http://youtube.com/watch?v=ewbuPY3uGQ4

And be prepared to be blown away by incredible filmmaking and timeless writing.

-SALVARE and Shakespeare

"Give 'em Hell Harry" Reid's Hypocrisy

Harry Reid Speech Summary

Here you have Harry Reid, Senate Majority Leader and faithful Latter-day Saint. He is a Democrat BECAUSE he is Mormon, not in spite of it. His faith and politics are deeply intertwined (this coming from the same man who said, "I hope that Mitt Romney's presidential bid is determined by his political stance, and not his religion"). He has "always" been "pro-life." Then you look below, and since you're all intelligent, I'm not going to explain it to you. Just read.

Abortion Funds Vote

-SALVARE

Salvare's Sentimentality

As much as Salvare would like you to think him a big tough macho man, he must admit that he cried at a movie tonight. He only watched the last hour of it, too, but it got to him. That movie was M. Night Shyamalan's "Signs," which isn't even all that well-made, but it has emotional punch when it comes to the "Family Coming Together to Realize God's Love for Them All in the Face of Tragedy and Certain Doom" category.

So now the truth is out: I'm pretty much a girl when it comes to sentimental movies; I love my emotions being manipulated, I love being caught up in the moment and impassioned by great stories of love and empathy and sacrifice and tragedy. In other words, I guess I'm just a sucker for sentimentality.

-SALVARE

"The Pash" (or The Beard That Grows Money)

Anyone can make a living doing anything.

Jack Passion, 23, is a prime example. He has managed to make a name for himself for having a 3-foot-long fiery red beard. "The Pash," as he is so affectionately called, took first place in the 2007 World Beard and Moustache Championships in the most competitive category: full beard natural. He has a degree in philosophy, and is a bassist coming out with a solo album. He has gotten offers for endorsements and may start his own line of beard-care products.

Anyone can make a living doing anything, even if that something is growing a beard.

There, now wasn't that uplifting?

a quick analysis of racism and standardized testing scores

Nevermind. It won't be quick enough, I'm going to sleep.

I wear socks in girls' sizes because they actually fit. If you look at the label on men's socks, it says that they are for a foot between size 8 and 12 usually. That means that if you wear a size 12, you will be able to fit your foot into the same size sock as a guy who wears an 8. What it really means is that they make them way too big for a guy with a shoe size smaller than 11. So I wear girls' socks, and they fit wonderfully. Some may think it strange, but it is probably an improvement on a previous habit:
not wearing any socks at all.

While I am here, I should mention something that is very good. Radiohead recently released an album online, and they are letting the listeners decide how much to pay to download it. That means that a kid in India can still afford it without missing a meal. It also means that I can afford it without missing a meal. In fact, I feel that the idea is so worthwhile that I actually did pay something for the music.

check it out, kids:
http://www.inrainbows.com/

My argument against Gurahamu

There are far better uses for gold. Such as selling. Or investing.

Porcelain Throne (Interpret THAT)

This post is written in reference to Sterling's post "I wish I had a muse".

Well, I wish I had a golden toilet.

Why? Why not, I ask you! There is no reason or argument to drive a person either way. What would I do with a golden toilet? Worship it? Sell it? Show it to all my friends who wouldn't believe me when I told them? As the story goes, I later told them that I had a bridge to sell and the bids just rolled in. There is just no practical use of a solid gold, or even gilded, toilet. But then again, why not? What is keeping me from having my own true porcelain throne? There is no reason for it, but I can't help but want one.

The phrase itself is the epitome of absurdity as well as sarcasm. I know this because I am a connoisseur of both (I do however find absurdity much, much more interesting and well received). The image displayed by this saying is absolutely ridiculous. The image becomes a lot more ridiculous when you realize its evolution. The list of changes ranges from throne to latrine and everything in between. The last improvement is found towering above the rest. It is the culmination of all its predecessors, perfected through time. It is the porcelain throne, a gilded masterpiece, a prince among, well... you know.

There is just something inconceivable and intangible that makes "I wish I had a golden toilet" a hallmark and a classic retort. If there was a prize for sarcasm (I'm looking at you, Alfred Nobel), this phrase would be awarded top honors. Yes, I truly wish I had a golden toilet.

I wish I had a muse.

that political test

http://www.okcupid.com/politics

As Gurahamu told me, it's for a dating web site, but it's pretty entertaining. Should only take about fifteen minutes or so.

I got "Socially Conservative" and "Economically Moderate" which somehow makes me...a Fascist. Weird. But I suppose that's what I am, or at least the first two.

Not Your Average Totalitarian

I recently took a test that placed me on a graph of different political classifications. I did this purely out of curiosity. I wanted to see if it would be accurate. In truth, I took several, but I will focus on the one I feel had the most thoughtful and inclusive questions.
At the end of this particular test, a political graph popped up. I took one look at it and laughed. On it were such extremes as anarchist, fascist, and socialist as well as more moderate classifications such as republican and democrat. My results was as follows, nothing more and nothing less: "Totalitarian". My dot was placed right between Osama bin Laden, Stalin, and Darth Vader (a very awkward place to be).
I am definitely not a totalitarian, and my answers should not have even led to this conclusion. One of the possible reasons for this result may have been the fact that there were no questions asking about free speech or related liberties. Now, I will not reveal what exactly I am or what my answers were, I will merely continue on to what I got out of this experience.
What I concluded hereafter can be summed up in three words: trust in yourself. Your mind is your mind, your heart is your heart. Learn what your mind can do and what your heart can feel. Ponder and pray about who you are. Don't instantly reject ideas or opinions. Rather, think about them, weigh them carefully. What I'm saying is find who you are, weigh every choice that comes into your life, and think about every idea that comes to you as well as every action you or others perform. That is what I learned from just taking a little quiz.

Small Children

I'm not sure what it is, but...there's just something absolutely hilarious about the words "small children." Case in point:



As I said before, I'm really not sure why that is, and I don't really care to analyze. I just enjoy it. Perhaps Sterling or Kupo would like to comment?

NaNoWriMo

It's that time of year again --- time for National Novel Writing Month!

http://www.nanowrimo.org/

Go register and start thinking about your potential novel(s). I already have the idea for mine...it's going to be based on a Christmas carol, with three parts, each like a novella that I will interweave and put together to form an actual novel. Good stuff. Now I just need to come up with a plot line to go with it....

I'll have to respond to that some other day. The thought for today: improving your memory improves your ability to repent and change.
After I sleep some, I'll come back and mention a couple reasons why I think that is correct.

Clarification

Maybe I wasn’t so clear with my sarcasm; I wrote it in twenty minutes around ten o’clock at night while waiting for something else to happen. Thus, it was rushed. And I don’t really feel like re-reading it, so I’ll just sum up what I was trying to say —

I believe in government seat belt laws, because the Law (big L, referring to all law established by the US Government) is designed to protect the people, or at least should be, and there really isn’t any difference between this and the law prohibiting murder. It is done in the interests of keeping its (the government’s) citizens alive and healthy.

From a libertarian (small l, regarding not the political party’s views but the basic tenets of what that idea means) perspective (which I am somewhat sympathetic to, but not in total agreement with because of what such principles lead to), there is no difference between what I do to myself and what I do to others. It is still my own action, and therefore should not be interfered with. Now, maybe that’s not what you believe, but that’s what’s at the core of that kind of philosophy, and I think libertarianism is A) prideful, B) rebellious, and C) against religion. As such, I do not conform to such “ideals.”

-SALVARE

Why Reagan was the best President ever

http://www.superdickery.com/oneshot/44.html

On the Libertarian thing: I can't really tell which side Salvare ended up on with the seat belts or anything else. Government should have more or less control? Explain what the sarcasm means and I will try to respond in a moderately intelligent manner.

Ha! A sneaky shortcut.

I applied online to go to BYU-Idaho this winter, and I am waiting for a letter of confirmation that I am admitted. I think I might have just figured out that I am admitted by trying to register for classes , because - if I can register for classes that means I am already admitted, right? Well, I'll just assume so, and you can, too. Unless I tell you something to the contrary.

'Tis the Season (2008 is closer than you might think)

For my brief introduction I would like to give our readers some simple, yet important challenges.

In the coming months, the political climate of America is going to heat up in anticipation of the indirect election of a new product of its unfortunate bipartisan struggle, and many untrue statements will be made and many untrue ideas will be believed. Accordingly, I encourage every reader of this post to read or reread the Constitution of the United States, the Bill of Rights, and the Declaration of Independence to remember the fundamental principles of freedom upon which this country was founded. Links to those documents can be found at http://usinfo.state.gov/usa/infousa/facts/funddocs.htm. You can set aside a day, or spread it out over a week; it does not take that long and I guarantee you will feel better about the decisions you make at the ballot-box, whatever they may be. You have time, but do not procrastinate.

I also challenge those of you who are religious to read or reread those texts or passages of texts that you consider sacred, and ponder and pray (if that is a tenet of your belief) the implications of your ideology upon how you will vote.

Most importantly, I challenge all who are legally and with good conscious able to vote to plan on voting. The principle is simple: if you do not speak, no one will hear you. Furthermore, taking a few minutes of one day to participate in decision-making that will affect your nation for the next four years is a comparatively small sacrifice.

America, let’s do this together!

Next blog: An Alternate Perspective to Salvare’s Comments on Libertarianism.

On some of the principles of libertarianism (this isn’t the Star Wars essay)

The idea for this post/column/essay came to me while driving, and I was thinking about the seatbelt law — the whole “Click It or Ticket” campaign or whatever in California. I was thinking of some sort of argument against those libertarians who say that seatbelts shouldn’t be enforced by the law because it’s my own business and it won’t harm anyone but me. And I was trying to come up with an argument, not because I’m fair-minded and I want to think both sides through, but to rationalize and articulate my gut feeling that such a law is absolutely a good thing, and just as valid and justifiable as laws protecting people from hurting each other.

And it’s really as simple as that. Those laws (against murder, rape, robbery, that kind of thing) are designed to protect the citizens of America from harm — no matter if they consented to it or not. So wouldn’t it be logical to pass a law protecting Americans from their own stupidity in not wearing a seatbelt? Aren’t people — human beings, with lives and drives and passions and thoughts and feelings — valuable to the government of the United States? That, after all, is why murder is outlawed to begin with.

So, with the principles of libertarianism going just a bit farther, perhaps we should decriminalize murder between two consenting adults. Oh wait, we’re already doing that with assisted suicide and the like. Clint Eastwood did it heroically in “Million Dollar Baby,” why can’t we do it just as heroically in real life?

And then, why does it have to be between two consenting adults? What business is it of the government if one person wants to harm another, or take someone else’s property? (Or is the government getting ready to be in that business relatively soon anyway, granted Hillary wins thirteen months from now?) Why should the government interfere with the people’s private lives? They’re private! They’re personal! They’re none of the government’s business!

I’m not telling you how to think. I’m merely pointing out some logical flaws via sarcasm.

Good night, and good luck.